The producers of Live 8 have decided to sue Anna Nicole Smith after she appeared drunk and scantily clad for her appearance at a summer concert in Philadelphia. Honestly, though. What the fuck did they suspect? Every appearance she's done since Trimspa helped her shed those excess layers of ass have had her "accidently" exposing her boobs and slurring so much the only real words we can make out is when she raises her arms slowly into the air and says, "Trimshpa, baybee!" Then her boobs pop out, EVERY SINGLE FUCKING TIME. What, did they think her appearance at a charity benefit would yield different results?
The producers are trying to get $500,000 for the allegations, which her lawyer, Howard K. Stern, states as "pure fiction and totally irresponsible." He believes she was being used as a scapegoat in a contract she wasn't even aware of, and was totally sober and told her attire was fine before her appearance. I actually believe this is yet another stitch of proof that this benefit organization has lost its way since Bob Geldof created it. The stupid bastards have to trump up ridiculous charges on a poor, innocent piece of ass like Anna, because they spend way too much of the donated money on the pricy demands of their performers. I suspect the judge will slam down his gavel and tell the Live 8 producers to stick it up their asses, assuming Anna Nicole doesn't flail about the courtroom and expose her cootch to the bailiff.
Hey, you may have noticed I didn't make any ludicrous statement concerning her lawyer's name, and how he probably told the reporters to strip down and farted into their microphones. Yeah brothers, that's called integrity.
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